Kill the...Geese?

What more can I say. I'm sure PETA is on it...Yesterday's Post Cover in response to the plane crash landing that miraculously no human lives were lost to. KILL THE GEESE! (Or maybe we should praise them?)

The Enigma REvisited

"Hey, remember that blue guy on that episode of the X-files?"

The Enigma is coming to cafe 9 again Thursday February Twenty-Sixth. This will be another night of good old fashioned Sideshow Circus freakishness. 

Nasty Disaster will leave a dirty metallic taste in your mouth......................

that you'll need a tall glass of Circus Delecti to wash down.

New Havens own(ly) circus sideshow will most definitely get you.....

pumped(?)

for the Enigma with their boneheaded and block headed antics, along with a contortionist, glass eating and walking, belly dancing, and whatever tasty new dishes they may be cooking up thistime around. Enjoy!

Coffee Cat alley cat race Saturday February 7th

Straight edge vegan nick and i are putting on an alley cat race centered around independent coffee shops and the baristas that make their bread and earth balance working there. these coffee shops use fair trade beans and teas etc. and are no doubt equal opportunity employers. get to know your local baristas and java joints. prizes will be awarded. out of towners and elis welcome, this aint just for townies. coffee will be provided throughout race. awards ceremony will take place at an undisclosed location; "booze cruise" will ensue post event. see you there. 

oh, guess who got publicity on HK fixed.

Videos: Demonstrations against Bombing of Gaza

One Of our contributors started to post a video on protests against the siege on gaza but wasn't able to. I'm not sure which protest he had in mind.....

I left out videos of people who had been hit by bombs and lay dead or dying.....

Thats what's happening. When you wake up tomorrow think of how lucky you are that you will never have to face these horrors unless you so choose. we are still free. we are the opressors, not the opressed.

Wait, I can explain,

So, the city released it's crime stats for 2008.....

Turns out crime went up in certain important categories like murders. That's not the surprise though. We all know there is an obvious correlation between the state of the economy and the rate of crime. The shock came when Mayor Johnny D Goode told us not to worry because the recent surge in crime was a result of the release of scores of felons over the past year, and that they were only shooting each other. That's a relief.

Police Chief Luck Berry added, "the only difference between a shooting and a murder is how alive the victim is. In one the guy's dead, in the other he's still breathing. What we're trying to do is figure out how to keep 'em breathing."

Here's the full speech:

Good and decent citizens of New Haven, I your dedicated and eternal mayor, John DeStefano, assure you that the crumbling streets of our fair city are safer than ever before (except if you are trying to cross them on foot). The increase in criminal activity over the past year has once again proven my point that when crime goes up in our city it is because of certain nefarious individuals committing bad deeds, and when crime goes down, it is because I did good stuff.

This past year crime has gone up, and it is not a result of my inability to do good stuff, rather, the criminal actions of others were so great as to overpower the good stuff I have done over the past 12 months as mayor.

Rest assured, that any gunfire you might hear is simply criminals shooting each other. To the best of our knowledge there is no credible evidence to suggest that criminals would ever target non-criminals. Thank you, and always remember, vote Destefano.